Parenting Children – The Five Areas of Greatest Concern

As I was raising my children, my goal was for them to grow up to be positive, contributing adults who are happy, well adjusted, healthy, and successful.

But, having been raised in a less than desirable home, I was unsure about how this can be done. With the help of many folks as role models and lots of reading, I realized it basically came down to five different areas of concern.

How to parent in such a way we prepare them to meet the challenges they experience

How to work with children who are living in different Family arrangements

How to insure children receive a good Education

How to raise Healthy children; and

How to help children who have experienced some kind of Trauma

In General, my recommendations are to:

o Remain a human being. As we parent our children, we constantly struggle with how we must change how we do it. They are changing as they move through infancy to school age to teenagers to adults and we must be prepared to change as well. I learned to enjoy my children and laugh a lot. There are times I wish I had been easier on them and laughed even more. But they are now some of my best friends.

o It’s how you treat them, not the Family structure. Many of our children are raised in different family structures, if not all their lives, at least part of it. No matter what family arrangement you are in, it’s the love and stability that will matter most.

o The education children receive is critical. Pay attention to what is going on at school. We must make sure they have access to good schools and teachers. The instruction children receive in reading and math in the first three years of school is one of the major keys in determining the level of success they will reach. Learning issues such as autism, ADHD, hearing, speech, etc. require us to provide intervention and remediation as early as possible.

o Healthy children make healthy adults. Today’s children are developing diabetes and obesity at an alarming rate. Emphasizing diet, exercise, and healthy habits early will help reduce these issues and increase the likelihood for good health into adulthood.

o Children can overcome trauma. Many children experience some kind of trauma, at home, at school or other places. These can create psychological and emotional problems, but having supportive people available helps them cope with and overcome the effects of this trauma. Treating them like they are victims will increase the likelihood of their becoming one. Helping them develop resilience to overcome these experiences is important to helping them develop into self-sufficient adults.

The greatest lesson I have learned is that it is very important for us to be available for our children through support, friendship, helping them feel needed, and listening to them, as well as accepting, supporting and intervening for them.

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